beenie

Diane Keaton or Michael Jackson?

It's Michael Jackson arriving in court today.

Go shorty, iss yo birfday, we gonna party like iss yo birfday

Happy birthday, Erica!!!

And now I can't get "In da Club" out of my head. S'okay, I don't mind it.

Shut that damn thing UP!!!

If you have a little dog, and said little dog is having a conniption fit about something and will. not. stop. barking., don't call me and let it continuously bark in my ear while you're yelling at it to shut up. Either put the damn thing in a room, or call back later.

6:00 AM phone calls

I swear, they should be illegal.

Just as I'm putting my shoes on to walk out the door, the phone rings.

Heart, meet stomach.

I was able to see on the caller ID that it's the apartment manager. The heart/stomach situation improved greatly, but all I could think was "WTF is the lady downstairs complaining about now? It's 6AM! We're NOT noisy in the morning at ALL!"

Apparently there's a problem with our bathroom. Bryan got a HUGE disgusting hair clog out of the drain yesterday, and now I'm wondering if maybe it took a chunk of really old, really rusted-out pipe with it, because when I took a shower this morning, water started dripping from a ceiling light fixture in the downstairs lady's bathroom.

The manager told me that they'd have to get in today to take a look at it, so no big deal. BUT... we're not having a stellar organization week and the place is a disaster, like to the point that a few minutes after I left the house, I almost turned around and took an unexcused personal day to clean before he got there. With all the garbage at work though, I decided against it and continued on my way. Poor Bryan though had the same thought but not as much work crap - unbeknownst to me until after the fact, he went in to work late and cleaned pretty much the whole place. He definitely gets the good husband gold star today.

I hope my shower's not too messed up.

Ejookayshunle

Seen in the Herpetarium at the Henry Vilas Zoo

For the uninitiated, note the blatant misuse of the apostrophe.

Ummm, yeah.

If you go to the tanning salon and get the spray-on tan, and they show you a video and the video says "make sure you use a LOT of barrier cream on your hands," REALLY make sure you use a LOT of barrier cream on your hands, and DON'T feel compelled to "rub your tan in," like they had that one guy Butch do on Queer Eye. Not using enough barrier cream and trying to rub everything in results in brown palms.

Not that I would know or anything...

{grumble grumble} scratcha-frackin' fat pasty arms, scratcha-frackin' sleeveless bridesmaid gown {grumble grumble}

I used to be a math whiz, but something's not making sense here...

Down there in my religion entry, I got 100% for Unitarian Universalism and 17% for Roman Catholicism. My Uncle got for 75% for Unitarian Universalism and 79% for Roman Catholicism.

If I'm 100% for one and only 17% for another, how the heck can someone be in the mid-to-high 70s for both? Doesn't make sense to me. Maybe it has something to do with how important you rate the questions? But still...

Now, I'm not going to sit here all day trying to figure out how that's possible - IF it's possible - but I think something's wonky with the Belief-o-Matic.

Fever

I have spring fever. Really frickin bad.

I do NOT want to be sitting at this desk. It is 81 flippin' degrees outside (in April! In Wisconsin!!), sunny with 26% humidity! 26%!!!! How often do you get 81 degrees with only 26% humidity in flippin' Wisconsin?!?!?!?!?!

I want to go home. I want to at least be on my WAY home, with the car windows down and the radio up. I want to feel the warm sun on my face and arms, not be cooped up in the tiny-ass cube with my fingers freezing off because of the climate-controlled atmosphere.

Meh.

The world's worst married person

So I went to my friend's place last night to help her pick out the bra that would be least noticeable with her gown, and for a practice run on the bustling. I took all of my rings off so I wouldn't snag her gown, and I put them on her dresser. Including my engagement ring and wedding band. I had been home for at least half an hour before I realized I wasn't wearing them. I wasn't going back out since it was bedtime, so I have no wedding ring today. :(

I feel naked.

Religion's a funny thing

I've taken the Beliefnet quiz before, but after seeing it at M's I decided to give it another whirl. I hadn't thought my beliefs had really changed, but I was curious. I got pretty much what I got last time I took it - 100% match for Unitarian Universalism, but it never ceases to amaze me that the religion I was raised in came in dead LAST in the "top 27 religions my beliefs are most closesly matched with."

I also have to say that matching 54% with Mormon, 51% with Christian Science, 41% with Jehovah's Witness and 35% with Scientology frightened me.

What is a Liberal Quaker?

Read the extended entry for the full rundown.

1. Unitarian Universalism (100%)
2. Liberal Quakers (94%)
3. Mainline to Liberal Christian Protestants (93%)
4. Secular Humanism (92%)
5. Neo-Pagan (78%)
6. Theravada Buddhism (71%)
7. Bahá'í Faith (65%)
8. Nontheist (62%)
9. New Age (62%)
10. Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints (Mormons) (54%)
11. Reform Judaism (53%)
12. Mahayana Buddhism (53%)
13. Taoism (52%)
14. Christian Science (Church of Christ, Scientist) (51%)
15. Orthodox Quaker (49%)
16. New Thought (43%)
17. Jehovah's Witness (41%)
18. Mainline to Conservative Christian/Protestant (39%)
19. Scientology (35%)
20. Sikhism (34%)
21. Jainism (34%)
22. Orthodox Judaism (24%)
23. Seventh Day Adventist (24%)
24. Hinduism (22%)
25. Islam (19%)
26. Eastern Orthodox (17%)
27. Roman Catholic (17%)

To be continued...

Sorry I've not been around much. Just haven't had the inspiration. Maybe that'll change, maybe it won't...